Love Your Children ... Without Counting the Cost
in nomine patri, et filii, et spiritui sancto amen
i remembered this was something that i wrote to the forum page of the straits times in response to the hoo-hah about the plunging rate of child births in singapore and the ways and means of getting couples to conceive. a lot of noise were made about baby bonuses and and cash incentives from the government to encourage married couples to have children but i just feel that couples who need money to have children are missing the forest for the trees.
the monetary benefits handed out by the government was a very short-term and short-sighted solution as the ultimate motivation for having children is LOVE....and not cash incentives. the money that is handed out - yes i agree that it is helpful as well as it will come in handy - can never replace the sacrifice and love that comes with having a child.
i always tell my friends.....having a kid is easy.... raising them to become God-fearing and good adults are a different thing altogether, especially in this age of media overdose and influence of western culture - wonder what my reply to elise and eliza will be if they use the 2nd amendment against me! mama mia santa lucia!
anyway this was my letter that was published:
A recent estimate put the cost of raising a child from birth to age 18 at US$160,140 for an American middle-income family. That doesn't even include college tuition.
But US$160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into US$8,896.66 a year, US$741.38 a month, or US$171.08 week. Still, you might think the best financial advice would be not to have children if you want to be "rich". However, the truth is just the opposite.
What do you get for the US$160,140? The following is what I read somewhere:
Naming rights. Glimpses of God every day. Giggles under the covers every night. More love than your heart can hold. Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs. Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies. A hand to hold, usually covered with jam.
A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites, building sand castles, and skipping down the sidewalk in the pouring rain. Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.
For US$160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to finger-paint, play hide-and-seek, and never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to keep reading the Adventures of Pooh and watching Saturday-morning cartoons, going to Disney movies, and wishing on stars...
For US$160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, taking the training wheels off the bike, removing a splinter...
You get a front-row seat to history to witness the first step, first word, first date, and first time behind the wheel.
You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and, if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren.
You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there with God. You have all the power to heal a booboo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost.
i thank God for elise and eliza everyday.... and i always remind myself to always tell them that i love them very much to the depths of my soul....
but i also tell elise that God loves her more than i can ever do, and Jesus will be with her all the days of her life long after i am gone. and she understands that...especially we have very open sharings about life, people and death.
somehow the happiest children i know comes from families that we in singapore would term middle-income.....maybe this paradox about money and happiness is what God have been trying to tell us as parents and adults? that money can NEVER replace the time spent and the love that we shower on our children?
children are gifts from God - treasure them; embrace them; nurture them and consecrate them amen
in nomine patri; et filii; et spiritui sancto amen
i remembered this was something that i wrote to the forum page of the straits times in response to the hoo-hah about the plunging rate of child births in singapore and the ways and means of getting couples to conceive. a lot of noise were made about baby bonuses and and cash incentives from the government to encourage married couples to have children but i just feel that couples who need money to have children are missing the forest for the trees.
the monetary benefits handed out by the government was a very short-term and short-sighted solution as the ultimate motivation for having children is LOVE....and not cash incentives. the money that is handed out - yes i agree that it is helpful as well as it will come in handy - can never replace the sacrifice and love that comes with having a child.
i always tell my friends.....having a kid is easy.... raising them to become God-fearing and good adults are a different thing altogether, especially in this age of media overdose and influence of western culture - wonder what my reply to elise and eliza will be if they use the 2nd amendment against me! mama mia santa lucia!
anyway this was my letter that was published:
A recent estimate put the cost of raising a child from birth to age 18 at US$160,140 for an American middle-income family. That doesn't even include college tuition.
But US$160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into US$8,896.66 a year, US$741.38 a month, or US$171.08 week. Still, you might think the best financial advice would be not to have children if you want to be "rich". However, the truth is just the opposite.
What do you get for the US$160,140? The following is what I read somewhere:
Naming rights. Glimpses of God every day. Giggles under the covers every night. More love than your heart can hold. Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs. Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies. A hand to hold, usually covered with jam.
A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites, building sand castles, and skipping down the sidewalk in the pouring rain. Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.
For US$160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to finger-paint, play hide-and-seek, and never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to keep reading the Adventures of Pooh and watching Saturday-morning cartoons, going to Disney movies, and wishing on stars...
For US$160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, taking the training wheels off the bike, removing a splinter...
You get a front-row seat to history to witness the first step, first word, first date, and first time behind the wheel.
You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and, if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren.
You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there with God. You have all the power to heal a booboo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost.
i thank God for elise and eliza everyday.... and i always remind myself to always tell them that i love them very much to the depths of my soul....
but i also tell elise that God loves her more than i can ever do, and Jesus will be with her all the days of her life long after i am gone. and she understands that...especially we have very open sharings about life, people and death.
somehow the happiest children i know comes from families that we in singapore would term middle-income.....maybe this paradox about money and happiness is what God have been trying to tell us as parents and adults? that money can NEVER replace the time spent and the love that we shower on our children?
children are gifts from God - treasure them; embrace them; nurture them and consecrate them amen
in nomine patri; et filii; et spiritui sancto amen
posted by ernie | 11:53 PM
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